Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize
