guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
