Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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