Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
