So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
