At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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