Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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