Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize