I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Two words: blizzard sex
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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