Texts From Last Night

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  (510): View more from California

  So drunk, too bad you don't want this

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  (510): So drunk, too bad you don't want this http://tfl.nu/0z98
  Replies (3) Good night (621) Bad night (880) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.

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  (407): Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007. http://tfl.nu/n4mi
  Replies (9) Good night (2972) Bad night (638) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  i think i have herpe

  (1-916): View more from California

  just one?

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  (916): i think i have herpe (1-916): just one? http://tfl.nu/e1l6
  Replies (32) Good night (1031) Bad night (4452) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.

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  (317): I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands. http://tfl.nu/acvp
  Replies (42) Good night (4196) Bad night (1488) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn

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  (916): I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn http://tfl.nu/z1in
  Replies (4) Good night (3019) Bad night (754) Order T-Shirt
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.

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  (765): Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom. http://tfl.nu/gaio
  Replies (32) Good night (3152) Bad night (5713) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.

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  (617): The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door. http://tfl.nu/n48k
  Replies (29) Good night (3813) Bad night (1361) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.

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  (818): Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested. http://tfl.nu/vry7
  Replies (15) Good night (4669) Bad night (989) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking

  (530): View more from California

  That could use a little rephrasing

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  (530): Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking (530): That could use a little rephrasing http://tfl.nu/xfz9
  Replies (5) Good night (1714) Bad night (606)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.

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  (313): I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer. http://tfl.nu/dqld
  Replies (19) Good night (1347) Bad night (616)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.

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  (317): Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina. http://tfl.nu/mqdf
  Replies (9) Good night (1326) Bad night (801) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.

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  (937): They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list. http://tfl.nu/o7iw
  Replies (6) Good night (1588) Bad night (356) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.

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  (631): She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real. http://tfl.nu/p8fj
  Replies (21) Good night (4579) Bad night (567) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Mole people?

  (425): View more from Washington

  Mole people

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  (425): The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are. (541): Mole people? (425): Mole people http://tfl.nu/8coi
  Replies (8) Good night (1113) Bad night (257)
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  (562): View more from California

  I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.

  (416): View more from Toronto

  You are not an adult

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  (562): I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride. (416): You are not an adult http://tfl.nu/skb0
  Replies (2) Good night (1038) Bad night (205)

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