i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize