dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
