I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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