so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
