Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
