Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
