i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Randomize
