my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
