How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
