I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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