He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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