We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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