how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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