Is it normal to miss your booty call?
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
and you said cock pushups were impossible
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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