I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
