i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Floor bacon is actually really good
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
