i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
