We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I need a beard to bite.
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