return my video game
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Randomize
