Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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