please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
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