Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
someone owes me an orgasm
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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