i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize