Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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