Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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