Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
