Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
