I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
