i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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