Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
