Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
All I want is dick and wine.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
