Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
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