his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
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I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
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I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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