i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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