If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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