just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
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