Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize