You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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