4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
