Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
